I wanted to go to Trinidad because my close friend is from there and it's a big part of her identity. I felt going there was part of being a real friend. She sees my white Connecticut world all the time and has vacationed with my family, so now it was my chance to meet more of hers and understand them better. It didn't hurt that the tradition of Carnival, that we see celebrated in Brazil, New Orleans and many other tropical islands, was originated in Trinidad and they celebrate in a BIG way! Festivities go on for a month, with the final long weekend before Lent having the biggest celebrations including all different fetes with music and costumes.
To really participate in Carnival one joins a band and plays mas. This means picking one of many bands/ groups way ahead of time and picking one of their costumes with photos online and getting one custom made for you. For two full days you hang with this crew and your food, beverages, music and bathrooms are taken care of. My Trini hostess wanted to play mas with Paparazzi Carnival. This band had 13 sections of elaborate feather and beaded styles. Each section has a theme. We decided to be part of Majestic, which they said stood for Empire Butterfly’s. Costumes come in two levels. Front line which are bigger and tend to have beautiful wings and larger feathers and cost a lot more. And back line with slightly less flash but the same colors and decorations so we all match. I originally dreamed of wearing big wings since I’d always admired them in the pictures, but Rhea warned me that wings are very hard to navigate in the dancing crowd, I went for a feather neck piece that made me feel a bit Disney Princess.
I've had a hard time matching words to the experience. It's just so different and immersing into a different cultural norm. The biggest take away for me was the idea of body positive. I haven't worn a bikini since I was about 9. I've always considered myself chubby and now I guess I think I'm fat. So wrapping my head around the idea of wearing practically nothing out in public was pretty daunting. Maybe the scariest thing I've ever done. But once I picked my outfit, I just tried to dive in and get excited. The first day of Carnival, the dress is more casual and my band actually wore t-shirts and tiny shorts. Still pretty minimal, but a good way to get used to it. That day I saw women of all sizes letting everything hang out. They just radiated confidence and I could feel my perception of beauty literally changing. Heck, curves are beautiful. If they they can show off theirs then I can certainly show off mine. And so I did, and I had a wonderful life changing time.
